21 Things I've Learned By 21

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Today is my birthday, which is kinda crazy because I really feel about 50! Since I've been alive for 21 years, I've learned a lot of stuff along the way. So here are 21 things I've learned in my 21 years of life. 


1. Kindness doesn't cost anything

I've always tried to be kind to others around me, but especially living in London, you see how rude people can be. So just being kind to a barista or letting a pregnant lady sit down on the tube  can make a huge difference in someones day. It also means you aren't an asshole!

2. Your age does not define you

I've always felt about 10 years older than I actually was. ALWAYS. So when someone says, "Oh, you're a baby!" or "You are too young", I completely ignore them. You know yourself better than anyone. You are the only one that can make decisions in your life. If someone is being patronizing about your age, fuck them. 

3. Everything you thought was the end of the world in high school doesn't matter anymore

All of high school felt like the end of the world to me. I hated it soooooo much. I didn't fit in, people thought I was weird, etc. But the second I graduated, none of that mattered anymore. I stayed friends with about 3 people and I haven't even thought about the rest of it. It's the best feeling. 

4. People will either love you or hate you

Maybe this is more of a personal thing I've learned, but my personality can be very polarizing. People either really like me or really don't; and I'm totally okay with that! Then you make sure you only have the best most supportive people around you. 

5. Quality over quantity; when it comes to everything

I'd much rather have 2 amazing friends than 100 shitty ones. I'd rather have 10 really good pieces of clothing than 50 crappy ones. Once you start being more aware of yourself and of the things you have in life, you start to realize that long lasting things are much more important.

6. Music can be transportive

Music has always been a huge part of my life and continues to be every single day. No matter what mood I am in, there is music to compliment my mood. Music can take you to another place in your mind and help you feel more creative, happy or relaxed.

7. So can films and books

The variety of film and books I've been watching and reading has grown exponentially since I've gotten older and I love it. You can learn so much by watching or reading something new.

8. It's okay to be a freak

If I had a dollar for every time someone called me a freak or called me weird, I would have a ton of money. But the thing is, I don't find it as an insult anymore. Being different is not a bad thing. 

9. Take care of your skin from an early age

Drink loads of water. Don't sleep with makeup on. Wear sunscreen. Wash your face. Moisturize. Your skin will thank you later.

10. Speak up

If you don't like something, speak up. If you like something, speak up. If you want something to change, speak up. 

11. Dress the way you want

If you want to wear a gorgeous vintage dress to the grocery store, do it! I finally feel like I've found my personal style (as Jaye likes to say, "a little vintage and a little goth") and it makes me feel confident. Everyone should find their own personal style; one that makes them feel good. 

12. True love does exist

I've always looked up to my parents marriage (they are high school sweethearts). I also always respected people who dreaming about getting married their entire life; I just didn't know if that was going to happen to me. And then I met Jaye. I have never had such a full heart in my entire life and I can't wait to marry that man. 

13. Everyone's life does not follow the same path

From a very early age we are force fed these ideals of "what everyone should want." AKA, college, office job, marriage, kids, big house, etc. But that is not what everyone dreams about in life. Maybe you decide not to go to college. Maybe you decided you want to get married but never have kids. That is okay! And don't let anyone tell you differently. 

14. Don't let people make you feel bad for being different

This kind of goes hand in hand with #8. Like I said, being different is not a bad thing. The negative things people say about you in person or on social media should just be ignored. You are different, you are an individual and that should be celebrated. 

15. Read, read, read 

If you are bored, pick up a book. Learn something new, better yourself and let your mind wander somewhere else.

16. The only person you should be competing with is your past self

You can look up to people and find them inspiring, but whatever you do, do not compare yourself to anyone but yourself. Everyone is different and has their own faults.

17. It's okay to not be religious

Growing up in suburbia, almost everyone was religious. Everyone loved to go to church and talk about their religion. I hated it and thought it was BS. It wasn't until I moved out of suburbia that I realized there were tons of other people like me who didn't give a shit about going to church.

18. Do what makes you happy

Yes, there are probably jobs out there that will make you more money. But if you aren't happy with what you are doing, you will be miserable. Do what makes you happy and get rid of all of the toxic energy or feeling in your life. Life is too short to be unhappy with your life.

19. Dogs are the best

Do I really need to explain this? They are the best. End. Of. Story.

20. Traveling is so important

See new cultures, meet interesting people, eat different food. You will only grow from these experiences.

21. Work your ass off and it will pay off

Do what you love, work damn hard at it and it will all pay off. Not only will you be more happy, but you will probably be very successful because you are passionate. Never ever give up on the things you love.


What are some of the most important life lessons you've learned?